


Ascension

by garyc0re



Series: Homestuck OC Drabbles [2]
Category: Homestuck, Original Work
Genre: Angst, Blood, Blood and Injury, Character Death, Dark, Death, Flushed Romance | Matesprits, God Tier (Homestuck), Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Mortality, Other, Stabbing, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-25
Updated: 2020-06-25
Packaged: 2021-03-03 23:08:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24913603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/garyc0re/pseuds/garyc0re
Summary: You don't have many friends on Alternia, but you suppose you should contact your matespirit before putting your fate in the hands of the game.
Relationships: Original Character(s)/Original Character(s)
Series: Homestuck OC Drabbles [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1803562
Comments: 2
Kudos: 2





	Ascension

**Author's Note:**

> graphic depictions of suicide are present in this fic!!! please do not read if it makes you uncomfortable. snow (the main character) uses he/she/they pronouns, and their matespirit (solace) uses he/him!

saccharineSugar [SS] began pestering testifiedUmbra [TU]. 

SS: hey.  
SS: i know you're probably busy with your sburb session right now. that's fine by me; in my opinion, its what we should all be busy with. this is a serious game, and we should all be doing our best at it, if we ever have any hope of restoring civilization.  
SS: considering this, i've decided to take initiative to attempt something that none of us have ever stepped foot in before.  
SS: i want to attempt to reach god tier.  
SS: i know what this entails. i know i have to kill myself, and that my death will quite possibly be bloody, and gruesome, and lonely.  
SS: but.  
SS: i am willing to make this sacrifice.  
SS: the horrorterrors on derse are only getting worse. on top of that, there are rumors of a rogue murderer on the loose.  
SS: they say he can have just about any power he desires due to our prototyping of our individual kernalsprites. due to this i feel as if we have created a powerful being, perhaps even indestructible.  
SS: i feel as though the only way to defeat him will be to reach god tier, and become essentially immortal myself.  
SS: with the facts aligned, this remains to be a logical conclusion in my head.  
SS: die, reach god tier, kill jack, win.  
SS: however, the...  
SS: emotional  
SS: side of my brain is very, very nervous about this plot of mine that i have devised.  
SS: what if this game mechanic is only theory, only rumour, and i never return?  
SS: what if i am only killing myself off, thus diminishing our party's numbers?  
SS: if i die, what will my fate be after the fact? i have never believed in any sort of afterlife, but now that my end lies perilously close, i find myself questioning my beliefs.  
SS: with these doubts, i have decided that the only way i can truly quell them would to be to message you, with my final parting words as a sburb player.  
SS: i believe that the answer lies on our dream planets, and in killing jack. please monitor him with the others should i not return.  
SS: i think i've had some good memories. it has been fun to band together as a team.  
SS: i never had this type of companionship when i was a child. i was forced to grow up too fast, and as a result i ended up lonely.  
SS: a child should never have to witness the things i should. a child should never have to contemplate the things i have.  
SS: it is fucked up.  
SS: but, i suppose in the end it all led me to you, solace.  
SS: i find it funny, considering the word "solace" in my human language means "comforting," and that's what you've always been to me.  
SS: you have made me feel like home, when i have never experienced a home before at all.  
SS: if i don't come back, then i'm going to miss you.  
SS: i really am. and i think its time to tell you that i love you.  
SS: i don't think i say that enough. i apologize for being so emotionally distant. i was never taught how to open up, either.  
SS: but i love you, and i will no matter how i turn out in the end.  
SS: i'm going to leave you now. i have a duty that must be attended to.  
SS: i do not believe you will understand, but i hope that you come to realize i only ever had good intentions with the actions i'm about to complete.  
SS: i love you.  
SS: try to stay safe in your session. i'm sorry for spamming your messages when you're so busy.  
SS: and goodbye, solace.  
SS: here's to hoping for another pesterlog.

saccharineSugar [SS] ceased pestering testifiedUmbra [TU]. 

\- - - - - - - - - -

You looked up from your phone, once again merged into the scenery of your own sburb planet - the Land of Keys and Frost (LOKAF). 

You had learned early on that this land was full of many puzzles beneath the bitter layer of snow encrusting it. It was a labyrinth of secret tunnels and dungeons, and it had all led you here.

On top of a snow-peaked mountain.

Gazing at a blindingly white quest bed.

It was time.

You capchalogued your phone, stepping forward. The snow around you caused your hands to numb, but that didn't stop you from crawling onto the bed and laying flat on your back, staring up at the cloudy sky below.

You took out a pocketknife from your waistband. It was a knife your grandfather had given you years before he died, for protection. In case your parents ever did something to physically harm you.

You studied the blade for a few moments and closed your eyes. You heart trummed hard in your chest. You refused to let your nerves get the best of you, gripping the handle of the weapon in tighter hands as your palms began to sweat.

In one vicious, sharp movement, you plunged the knife deep into your neck.

Your vision blurred and the only thing you registered was pain, and a coldness against your neck from the sharp blade. You realized too late that you had missed the vein that killed you in one shot. You struggled to breathe as blood began to bubble around your throat, making a garbled choking sound.

Your first instinct was to fight, and flee. To call out for help. To message Solace and let him know you'd changed your mind.

But you were determined. Dark red blood stained the white bed below you. Your grip weakened until your hands slid off the knife. You struggled to breathe.

Eventually, your eyes slipped shut, and your chest heaved one last breath.

Your head buzzed with perfect silence for a moment, as if the world had suddenly blipped out. And then, you heard faint buzzing around you.

You still couldn't open your eyes, couldn't move, but you could feel your body being lifted up. The pain at your neck started to lessen, and you felt less blood run down the side of your skin. You registered pleasing tingles as you were supposedly healed, and you relaxed into these tingles with a gentle sigh.

And then, you felt it; you felt your dream self, your derse counterpart, merge with your own. They tingled pleasantly as their consciousness merged with yours, and you suddenly had perfect clarity of all things derse. 

You had always had good vision of derse before, but it had been blurred and muffled - like you were dreaming.

It all, suddenly, felt real.

When you finally opened your eyes, you felt renewed with a sense of unbreakable lifeforce, as if you could accomplish anything. You spent some time on your quest bed, your chest heaving with the effort. Your hand came up to touch your neck, finding your wound completely healed, as if you had never stabbed yourself at all.

You pushed yourself slowly into a sitting position.

You weren't on your planet anymore. Instead, you were on a black and white battlefield. When you looked down, you found yourself clad in brown and green pajamas. You had to steel yourself as you realized what this meant for you.

You had ascended to god tier.

You were going to save your team.

**Author's Note:**

> she's a seer of life for anyone curious  
>   
> also been playing around w/ trying to figure out pesterlog formats...


End file.
